On Display

I struggle to write this but there's something I am feeling right now about what I do for a living. I love my job, I love Gateway, I love everything about what I get to do for a living. But...I am having a hard time with communicating so much...it's not that I can't or even that I'm having a hard time coming up with stuff to preach...it's more that it's so open and honest and vulnerable. Think of it this way even though for some it may be a little harsh (you'll get over it, remember this blog isn't for you, it's for me)...

Can you imagine getting up and talking about your marriage every single week in front of several hundred people? Can you imagine talking about the fights in your marriage every week? Can you imagine talking about your sex life in your marriage each and every week? That's what I feel like I do. I reveal the most intimate and honest aspects of my intimate relationship with the Lord.

If you talked about your marriage and your married sex life every week I guarantee that at some point you would get sick of it...sick of being so open...and you would desire it to be private again...that what happens within the context of your marriage stay there. You would want to date and not tell anyone. You would want to work through struggles and not tell anyone. You would want to be intimate and not tell anyone about it. You would want to do all of those things because that's what married people do and because the mere definition of intimacy is with one alone ...YOU WOULD NOT FEEL LIKE SHARING THE INTIMATE DETAILS.

That is where I am right now. I am excited just to walk with the Lord and not tell anyone about what we talk about. I am excited to receive correction and not tell anyone about it. I am excited to be intimate and not tell anyone about it. I just want to do it because that's what He and I love to do...be together and be alone.

I can't wait to get alone.