Tuesday, September 25, 2007

The Value of Peace

How much is peace worth to you? How much value do you place on it? Do you even know what real peace is? When was the last time you experienced true peace?

All great questions that I have been facing over the past few weeks. There's been a lot rumbling around in me since my trip to Colorado Springs...but really for the past 6 or 7 months.

I haven't been sleeping well. I haven't been eating well. I'm clinching my teeth at night. It's just been a stressful half year. When I was in Colorado I had some time just to be alone, not really even with the Lord, just alone. It was good. It was healthy. But when I got back home I started to realize how ridiculous my stress was to the Lord and to me. There's no reason for it. Absolutely no reason for it. It is all, completely, 100% self-imposed. This is where I am an idiot. I beat myself up. I expect entirely too much too soon. It's very unhealthy.

I started looking at all of God's blessings that surround me...

I am so grateful for my relationship with the Lord. I feel like we've come a long ways in the past two years. I hope it only continues on this path for the rest of my life.

Words cannot express the depth of love I feel for my wife. It gets harder and harder to describe how I feel about her every year. She is the greatest gift the Lord has ever allowed me to enjoy. She inspires me. She protects me. She encourages me more than any person in my life. She is the most incredible mother. I am blessed.

My children. 10 years ago I never could have imagined that this is what my life would look like. Each of my children is responsible for taking me to a new level with the Lord, as a man, as a father, as a husband. They truly enrich my everyday life. They are the best responsibility I have ever been given. I am overwhelmed with love and pride for Rylie, Tyler and Preston.

Our jobs. Holly has been with Pat for over ten years now and I have been with Gateway for over 7. Holly and I say all of the time that we never imagined this is what life would look like at 40, let alone 30. We are blessed beyond finances. I have front row seat to one of the fastest growing churches/church staffs in the country. I have favor with those above me. I have an opportunity to learn at an accelerated pace by watching Pastor Robert do what would take me 10 times as long to learn on my own. God has me in a great place. Holly has a job where she can work at a sustainable pace while she takes care of our kids all day. I am amazed that she continues to keep on keeping on. She has unbelievable favor with her boss...UNBELIEVABLE.

Our friends. We are surrounded by people that we love and who love us. They carry a burden for us. They walk with us. They grow with us. Life would not be the same without those that we love whom we call friends.

I am blessed. I will celebrate not sulk. I will give thanks not gripes. I will seek peace not stress. I choose to look at my life and all that comes with it and rest in the fact that God's hand is on my life and that he has it all figured out. I will follow His plan and not make my own. I will obey and not rebel. I am at peace...for the first time in quite some time...and it feels great.